Child Arrangements at Christmas

Me and my ex-partner both want the children at Christmas, what shall we do?

If you are the child’s primary carer, you may want them to be with you for the entire festive period. However, you must think about the impact this will have on the children. The children need to spend quality time with both parents during the festive period and therefore it is important to keep the arrangements as fair as possible. Once you have agreed what will happen, it is important to remember to put it in writing. Although this document will not be legally enforceable, it will help to clarify the details and prevent misunderstandings later on in the event that either of you are unable to remember what was said.

If you are unable to agree, then the issue can be referred to mediation or correspondence sent from a solicitor to try to resolve the arrangements. As a last resort, it is possible to have the issue determined by the court.

How do Courts deal with Christmas child contact disputes?

The court always encourage parents to reach an agreement between themselves for any arrangements relating to the children. It has always been a requirement of the court that the parties have attended mediation prior to making an application (unless there is a valid exemption).

Since 29th April 2024, the court now has the ability to pause or stop proceedings whilst the parties attend alternative non-court dispute resolution such as mediation.

If you are unable to reach an agreement outside of court, the matter will be listed for a Final Hearing where the court will ultimately decide on the arrangements they believe to be in the child’s best interests. The court will take into account several points when making a decision, including the following:

• The child’s wishes and feelings;
• The child’s physical, emotional and educational needs;
• The likely effect on the child of any changes in circumstances;
• The child’s age, background, sex and any other relevant characteristics;
• Any risk of harm there may be to the child;
• The parents’ abilities to meet the child’s needs.

Can our current Christmas child arrangements order be changed?

If you already have a child arrangements order that sets out the arrangements for Christmas, this will be the default arrangement. However, any child arrangements order can be varied, by agreement, between the parties. You can either discuss any changes directly, attend mediation or communicate through solicitors. If an agreement cannot be reached, you can make an application to the Court as a last resort.

If your child arrangements order does not refer to Christmas, then you are free to negotiate and agree between you.

What if my ex doesn’t stick to the child arrangements order?

If the other parent fails to adhere to the agreed order, it is recommended that you speak to a solicitor who can advise you of your options. If the other parent has a valid reason, such as sickness, travel or emergencies, you can try talking to them and consider alternative options to deal with the matter amicably. You should always avoid sending hostile messages or shouting at the other parent in front of the children as this will not help matters and may be used against you.

If the other parent does not have a valid reason and has a history of breaching the terms of the order, you may need to ask the court to enforce the order. However, the court is closed on Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Boxing Day and therefore it can be difficult when trying to make up for lost time over Christmas.